please..no more love

im tired..damn tired..
i always say this.. "adda..u don't need love. just study. you know who you are.you don't have time to seek for love.you don't have time to craved for love.. everything is just useless~! all you have to think is you future..your family and yourself"

but..why i feel cheated by nur syuhada? i mean.. do i cheat myself? im not being true to myself. People might say that I look stupid. yes,i am stupid. I just don't want to admit it. Im afraid. Im too afraid that..if i SAY IT.. the feelings will getting stronger and stronger..

Im a coward. i don't have strength to face the reality. Im afraid i'll cry..i'm too afraid too fall.. I'm afraid that I can't climb the stairs..

LOVE. my friend said that.. LOVE is crucial.. but i don't think so...
am in love??? with who??? siapakah lelaki malang itu?? ahhahaha

well.. i do like someone now. but im not sure with my feelings
is it love or just a crush.. i hope its just a CRUSH..

whyy??? because i don't wanna cry anymore..
i can't bear the 'consequences' .. what i mean iss... im very very very sure
that he won't love me ... he's way too good for me.. he deserve a better girl
not a clumsy messy stupid girl
huahuahuahuahauahuaauahaua

stupid adda. u go die. LOL